Lesbians and Femininity—Opposites?
When I read Lorde’s article, “Age, Race, Class, and Sex: Women Redefining Difference,” I became immediately interested in her description of the fear that black heterosexual women have of black lesbians. As Lorde writes, “A fear of lesbians, or of being accused of being a lesbian, has led many Black women into testifying against themselves” (Lorde 457). It is important to note the community in which such fear operates. Black women (those who live in mostly Black neighborhoods) exist as the opposite—the counterbalance—to the overwhelming (sometimes violent) and dominant masculine roles taken on by Black men. As a young Black man who used to live in an urban, predominately Black neighborhood, I can say that gender roles are blatant from the moment one steps onto the street. In communities like my old one, the concept of homosexuality of men—or, of women in particular—is such a taboo topic. Black lesbians experience institutional discrimination that is three-pronged—first, for being Black; second, for being women; and third (and certainly not the least of all), for being a lesbian. These three labels immediately put a stigma around the concept of being a Black lesbian—for operating outside of the ‘norm’ of heterosexuality and men’s cultural and institutional definitions for what it is “to be a woman”. Lorde briefly illustrates this stigma by writing,
“…heterosexual Black women often ignore or discount the existence and work of Black lesbians. Part of this attitude has come from an understandable terror of Black male attack within the close confines of Black society…But part of this…comes from a very real fear that openly women-identified Black women who are no longer dependent upon men for their self-definition may well reorder our whole concept of social relationships” (Lorde 457).
Lorde highlights an important aspect of the fear that operates in the Black community. Essentially, the heterosexual men in this community fear and feel threatened by the presence of lesbians. Black men feel as though black lesbians are attempting to undermine the very existence of their male, heterosexual institution. This certainly brings up an interesting point about lesbians who may come off as more masculine than what is culturally accepted (which is essentially non-masculinity, or ‘femininity’). Such lesbians are unjustly deemed ‘“butch”—the derogatory slang term used to describe a lesbian who is notably masculine in manner or appearance”’ (http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/butch). Touching upon this concept of lesbians who ‘are notably masculine in manner or appearance,’ I would like to incorporate an article that I found online. The article (“Black Lesbian Sues New York Restaurant for Discrimination”) documents the story of a black lesbian woman, Khadijah Farmer, who went into a New York City restaurant to dine with her girlfriend in the spring of 2006. When Farmer went to go use the women’s restroom, she encountered a woman who told her that “[this] is the women’s restroom…” According to Farmer, “the bouncer of the restaurant/bar went into the restroom and began questioning her…he pushed and banged the door” (http://www.jasmynecannick.com/blog/?p=1166). Farmer says that the bouncer humiliated her and violated her privacy. With the given situation, the restaurant asked both Farmer and her girlfriend to leave the restaurant. As a result, Farmer filed a civil lawsuit. Farmer’s story is one of many that highlight the injustices that occur today (based on sexual orientation, gender, etc.). Ultimately, Lorde emphasizes the need for women (of all sexual orientations) to address these injustices, their implications for differences from woman to woman, and possible solutions to unite the community of women.
http://www.jasmynecannick.com/blog/?p=1166
Discussion Questions:
1.) Do you think that Khadijah would have been harassed and asked to leave the restaurant if she were a white lesbian who appeared ‘masculine in manner’? Why or why not?
2.) In our society today, how do femininity and lesbianism relate? Can a woman both be a lesbian and ‘be feminine’? Or, does being lesbian compromise men’s institutional definition of femininity?
3.) Given that Black heterosexual women “often ignore or discount the existence and work of Black lesbians”, how would Lorde remedy the problem between Black heterosexual women and Black lesbians? Is there a solution? Despite reluctance (on the part of the heterosexual women), can these two groups of women recognize their differences?
